On the big day

There’s work to be done -- and fun to be had -- when the big day arrives

When the ceremony ends

• Help the photographer in grouping guests together for photographs if necessary.
• Make sure that all the guests have directions and transport to the reception, arranging lifts where needed (carry some spare maps!).
• Make sure that you leave for the reception venue with the bridesmaids immediately after the bride and groom so that you arrive shortly after.

Your reception role

When you get to the reception venue, your duties are as follows, though some will depend on whether you have agreed to take on the role of toastmaster:

• Collect any messages from the bride’s father and check to see if any messages have been delivered directly to the reception venue.
• Join the receiving line, if asked to by the hosts, to greet and welcome guests as they move into the reception room and help them find their places.
• When everyone is seated and before the meal or buffet is served, call for silence, ask people to stand and welcome the couple into the reception room as newlyweds.
• When the meal is finished, call for silence and introduce the speeches. Invite the bride’s father to speak first. After the bride’s father has delivered his speech and toasted the bride and groom, introduce the groom to say his few words.
• The groom’s speech ends with a toast to the bridesmaids. You will reply to this toast on behalf of the bridesmaids and deliver your speech, read congratulations from absent family and friends, and close by toasting the bride and groom. You can find all the detail you need on making a fantastic best man’s speech, plus ideas, toasts, jokes and sample speeches, in our confetti speech centre .

Once the speeches are over, you can breathe a sigh of relief and announce the cutting of the cake.

Get dancing

Now the big speech is out of the way you can relax a little. It’s tradition to dance with the chief bridesmaid first, joining the bride and groom mid-way through their first dance.

Your responsibilities are not over yet, however. You need to keep a general eye on the proceedings to ensure that everything is running smoothly. If wedding cameras have been put out on the guests’ tables, for example, ensure they are used throughout the reception and collect them at the end.

Have fun supervising the decoration of the groom’s car -- or whatever transport is taking them away from the venue that evening. Bear in mind though, that the car needs to remain in working order, especially if the happy couple are going straight off on their honeymoon and need to catch trains or flights later.

It’s all over

Finally, assist the hosts in bringing the celebrations to a close, making sure everyone has transport home or can find their room if they are staying overnight at the reception venue.

• The hosts -- especially if they are the bride and groom -- may appreciate it if you offer to check the bill and ensure any outstanding payments are settled at the end of the night.
• When you leave the venue, take a last look round for any stray presents or lost property. Collect them together and keep them safe until you can return them to their rightful owners.
• As soon as possible after the wedding, arrange to collect any hired outfits so that they can be returned and deposits refunded. Make sure any items left at the venue find their way back to their owners.

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