Common themes in Bible readings

Thinking about the message you want to convey can help you decide on the right reading for your church wedding ceremony

Hints for a happy life

There's plenty of advice in the Bible about making your marriage a successful one, and no lack of texts on the moral obligations of marriage either.

Of course, the ways in which the biblical writers thought centuries ago may now seem rather outdated. Saint Paul, for instance, is often accused of male chauvinism, and his advice to the early Christians of Ephesus seems to bear this out:

Give way to one another in obedience to Christ. Wives should regard their husbands as they regard the Lord, since as Christ is head of the Church and saves the whole body, so is a husband the head of his wife; and as the Church submits to Christ, so should wives to their husbands, in everything.

(Ephesians 5:21-24)

In fact, modern commentators claim that what St Paul really means is that husband and wife should give way to one another and, indeed, Paul goes on to say that the husband 'must love his wife as he loves himself' and sacrifice himself for her.

Although few feminists will be satisfied by this answer, a surprisingly large number of women still choose this text, so some, at least, are convinced. Indeed, Eastern Orthodox couples have no choice in the matter, as in their tradition it remains one of the two obligatory texts in the marriage service.

If you are looking for something less politically incorrect, however, try the following:

You are God's chosen race, his saints; he loves you, and you should be clothed in sincere compassion, in kindness and humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with one another; forgive each other as soon as a quarrel begins. The Lord has forgiven you; now you must do the same. Over all these clothes, to keep them together and complete them, put on love. And may the peace of Christ reign in your hearts, because it is for this that you were called together as parts of one body. Always be thankful.

(Colossians 3:12-15)

So whatever you're looking for, the Bible is a sufficiently vast resource to find something to suit you. Remember that your priest or minister will be happy to help you, and if you're not very religious yourselves, don't hesitate to ask family or friends who may be more familiar with the book.

Lastly, if you wish to go for a text outside of the ones suggested to you, stick with your choice: don’t forget that it is your ceremony and the most important thing is that the readings you choose are right for you.

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