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Ask Kate: Gift List With Evening Invitations

August 6, 2013

Kate Thompson has been offering heart-felt advice and sparklingly different wedding inspiration for ten years. She is married with two children, and often features in the national press. With her warm and caring nature and off-beat sense of humour, she'll answer every question with knowledgable insight and understanding to help and inspire or simply restore your peace of mind.


We are sending out evening invitations and want to let guests know that we have a wedding list available but don’t want it to sound as though they are obliged to buy a present. How should we word this?


It is generally considered ill-mannered and tactless to mention, or even enclose, a wedding list with the invitations as this could be interpreted that buying a gift is conditional upon accepting the invitation. However, it is very common now to mention the gift list in the invitation.

It’s really up to you but I don’t think you should mention your gift list to guests who are only invited to the evening reception. If they want to buy you a gift, they will ask if you have a gift list, but if they are only coming to the evening, they may just send a card.

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