Ask Kate: How Do We Ask For Cash?

August 6, 2013

Kate Thompson has been offering heart-felt advice and sparklingly different wedding inspiration for ten years. She is married with two children, and often features in the national press. With her warm and caring nature and off-beat sense of humour, she'll answer every question with knowledgable insight and understanding to help and inspire or simply restore your peace of mind.


Me & my fianc√© have decided that we don’t want a gift list as is normal at weddings & would prefer, if they wish to, that our guests give us cash. I know etiquette says this is inappropriate but I have seen a wishing well that can be used for this purpose but we are unsure on how to word the request to our guests please help


Thank you for your email and congratulations on your impending wedding. You are right that traditionally it is improper to make any mention of a gift list in your invitation as it could be taken that your invitation is dependent on a gift. These days however most guests will not be offended at being asked to give a gift or vouchers or even cash, indeed some are glad to have the information as they will want no doubt want to get you something you would like. There are different ways of alluding to a cash gift list and the wishing well or treasure chest are nicer ways of doing this for your guests than simply handing over the cash! These Wishing Wells also make ideal table centre pieces too!

You can buy a Wedding Wishing Well at:

You could use one of the following in your invitations:

Although your presence is
The only present needed,
If you’d like to wish us well
Please use our Wedding Wishing Well

or simply:

As we already have a toaster we have chosen not to have a formal gift list but will have a Wedding Wish Well at the reception for anyone who would like to ‘wish us well’ on our path to married life.

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