Ask Kate: Second time lucky

August 8, 2012

Kate Thompson has been offering heart-felt advice and sparklingly different wedding inspiration for ten years. She is married with two children, and often features in the national press. With her warm and caring nature and off-beat sense of humour, she'll answer every question with knowledgable insight and understanding to help and inspire or simply restore your peace of mind.


I am due to get married for the second time and have a couple of questions;

1. Who will give me away? My father died nine years ago. Could I ask my brother or could my mother even give me away?

2. Will we be able to get married in church?



You can choose anyone to walk you down the aisle – so ask whomever you feel you would most like to walk with.

It could be a very strong possibility that your vicar will refuse to marry you in his church as you have already been married, but they may not – it’s up to their discretion. Below I have jotted down a few of the options available to you if you would like to include the church.

1. If you belong to the Church of England, you can see your vicar. A few vicars will marry those who have been divorced before. If you live in a parish where the vicar says no, you are unlikely to be able to marry in a different parish.

If you belong to one of the Free Churches (Methodist, Congregational, URC, Baptist etc), or you have problems with the first two avenues, go to one of these churches and see the minister. There is no automatic right to be married, and not every minister will say yes (depending on the circumstances) but it can be possible to get married again in a church.

2. If the vicar won’t marry you, marry in your local register office and have your marriage blessed afterwards in the church. This can be any church; it doesn’t have to be one in your parish.


Kate x

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