Emma's answers to Upsetting dad

Question

My parents are divorced and my mum has remarried a terrific man who helped to raise me. I also keep in touch with my real dad. I'm getting married in two years time and don't know who should give me away. Is it possible for them both to? I have arguments for both sides. My dad has another daughter from his second marriage and will be able to give her away and my step dad has no children other than my brother and myself. But my dad is my dad.

Answer

There are a number of different options open to you and you need to decide which you think would work best for you and your family.

1. Both your father and step father could give you away. How do you think they would feel about this? Do they have a good relationship with each other? The last thing you want on your big day is to be in the middle of the tension between the two men. This I think is only an option if they have an amicable relationship.

2. Split the 'duties' of father of the bride. Ask your dad to give you away and your step dad to make the speech, or vice versa. This way they are both involved in your wedding.

3. Ask your mum to give you away - she has been with you through everything, and this will remove any chance of upsetting your dad or step dad. Another option is to walk down the aisle on your own. This way you don't have to choose between anyone!

4. Not every vicar may approve of this so it's something you need to ask about, but your fiance could walk down the aisle to come and collect you, and walk with you to the altar.

Emma x