Emma's answers to Divorced parents

Question

My parents are divorced. My father has settled with a new partner and my mother is still single. They aren't even on speaking terms with each other. I've asked my father to give me away, but my mother doesn't want him to have anything to do with the wedding. My father has suggested that he not attend as a formal guest but sits quietly at the back of the church and then leaves after the ceremony. I want my parents there as equals as they both brought me up and only divorced two years ago. If my father goes then my mother will not.

Answer

What I suggest to you is;
* Sit down and talk to them, preferably together, so they can't twist things.
* Tell them that this is the biggest day of your life and not only do you want them there to share it but you also NEED them there to help you through it.
* Explain their support is very important to you.
* Ask if they can put everything behind them and enjoy the special day.

The MOST important thing you can tell them is:

By not coming the only person they are hurting is YOU ! Do they want this?

Perhaps your father will also understand that it won't be appropriate for him to bring his new partner.

If they still can't agree, unfortunately you will have to reach a compromise. Your father could give you away at the ceremony without your mother there, and your father could then leave while your mother attends the reception. It's certainly not ideal but means they are both included in the day.

Emma x