Lines to kick off with

Written by    Last updated: June 6, 2006

To get the crowd on your side from the off, you need a killer opening line for your best man’s speech ‐‐ try these for size

  • ‘For the second time today, I rise nervously from a warm seat with a piece of paper hand in my hand…’
  • ‘Fornication, fornication… for‐an‐occasion such as this, it’s an honour to stand here as the best man for the marriage of my dear friends Tom and Mary…’
  • ‘For those of you who bet on me giving a speech under three minutes in the sweepstake, you could be in the money. Thanks and goodnight.’
  • ‘I asked my Dad for some advice about making this speech today and he said: don’t mention politics, sex or religion. Sadly, I never tend to take his advice. So, Tony Blair walks into the confessional wearing stockings and suspenders, and the priest says…’
  • ‘When David asked me to be his best man it came as quite a shock. I’d only known him a year. But then I guess you get close very quickly when you’re sharing a cell…’

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