For any deeply sensual experience, apart from engaging our imagination, we need the full participation of all our five senses. By removing distractions and by enhancing the enjoyment of each sense, we can create an ideal stage for sexual intimacy.
Sense of Sight
- Colours: The exact shade of colour you choose to decorate your room is a matter of personal choice, but it should suit the sense of intimacy you wish to create.
- Lighting: Candles and tealights are perfect for a romantic touch. You could also change the bulbs in the bedroom to softly tinted peach ones; it creates a lovely glow (and more flattering to get naked by!).
- Mirror trick: A free standing mirror in your bedroom angled towards your bed can be a turn on and intimacy builder.
- Tidiness: According to Feng Shui, any form of clutter blocks good energy. The bedroom as a place of rest and intimacy should be airy and tidy.
- No distractions: Remove anything that can distract from focusing on each other: banish the TV, only keep photographs of each other in the room (there are other places in the home for pictures of family, children, pets, etc.).
- Off limits: The bedroom should be the one place that is off limits to others in the home. Children and pets will need to be taught that they cannot enter without invitation.
Sense of touch
- Linen: Freshly laundered and scented good quality linen is always a turn on.
- Satin: Invest in a satin throw and you’ll have a quick way to set a scene any time you’re in the mood.
- Massage: Learning the basics of sensual touching and specially blended massage oils are a sure way to bring you closer.
- Lingerie: Throw away any baggy pants you have lying around, keep only well‐fitted, sexy underwear in your drawers. Real silk or satin is wonderful to touch and is fabulously luxurious to wear.
- Nightwear: While comfort and getting a good sleep is the most important element in choosing nightwear, there is still no excuse for passion‐killer nightgowns. Choose pure cotton for comfort and find something that flatters your shape.
- Temperature: Set the thermostat to a comfortable level in the bedroom.
Sense of taste
- Drink: Keep alcohol to a minimum ‐ you want to remember the good bits, don’t you? Go for quality rather than quantity, so a well mixed cocktail or champagne (always a safe bet), and don’t forget a bottle of still water.
- Food: Ideally you should avoid eating for at least two to four hours before, as the body’s energy will be diverted to digesting the food. The best aphrodisiac is the humble oats porridge, which releases energy slowly so that you have greater stamina for all that physical work!
- Breath: Whether you’re a smoker or not, having fresh smelling breath is a great turn‐on. Parsley or mint leaves are a natural breath freshener, while strong mints create a wonderful tingling sensation.
- Chocolates: Research has found that chocolate does make you feel sexier! Eating chocolate releases phenylethylamine and serotonin, which are mood lifting agents and also gives an energy boost, increasing stamina. Keep a box of best quality (high cocoa content) chocolates handy.
Sense of hearing
- Interruptions: Banish ticking clocks and answering machines, turn off any alarm clocks and definitely switch that mobile off.
- Music: Whether you decide to have music in the room depends on how you and your partner feel about it. However, avoid distracting lyrics, radio, and high volumes ‐ you want to be able to hear your partner.
Sense of Smell
- Freshness: A bedroom that is stuffy and unventilated not only causes disturbed sleep but could also be a passion‐killer. Open your bedroom windows for a minimum of half an hour each day.
- Ioniser: Installing an effective ioniser will help improve the air quality by eliminating dust, pollen, micro‐organisms and odours.
- Aromatherapy: Natural scents have an amazing power to change your mood and also act therapeutically. Buy good quality essential oils and use in either an oil burner or simply put onto some pot pourri and place in the room. Some of the scents used are rose, neroli, ylang ylang and jasmine.
- Flowers: Fresh, sweet‐smelling flowers such as rose add a wonderful touch of nature and the outdoors into the bedroom