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Marriage Quotes: 15 Funny, Romantic and Meaningful Examples

6th April 2018 |By | Be the first to comment

Are you looking for marriage quotes? Good quotes about marriage can be used to personalise your wedding stationery, to pepper a best man’s speech and to include if you’re writing your own wedding vows. Here are 15 of our favourite marriage quotes – from the funny to the heartfelt.

15 marriage quotes

“Marriage is a wonderful invention, but then again so is a bicycle repair kit” – Billy Connolly

This cheeky Billy Connolly quote is perfect for a best man speech – put it in and wait for the laughs.

Billy Connolly Marriage Quote

“When I get married, I want to be very married” – Audrey Hepburn

Audrey Hepburn is just perfection, isn’t she? And this quote will speak to couples everywhere – be inspired by the simplicity of it when it comes to your wedding vows.

Audrey Hepburn Marriage Quote

“Marriage is a great institution, but I’m not ready for an institution” – Mae West

Actress Mae West, famed for her one-liners, had this to say about marriage. This is one of the sassiest marriage quotes, and is guaranteed to get a few laughs in a wedding speech.

Mae West marriage quote

“Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage: they’ve experienced pain and bought jewellery” – Rita Rudner

If the wedding includes a groom with a pierced ear, you have to work in this marriage quote by Rita Rudner. We think this is ideal for a maid of honour speech.

Funny marriage quote

“A marriage is always made up of two people who are prepared to swear that only the other one snores” – Terry Pratchett

Everyone can identify with this Terry Pratchett quote about marriage, right? It’s ideal for a father of the bride speech, where the dad of the bride is expected to impart some wisdom to the newlyweds.

Terry Pratchett quote about marriage

“When marrying, ask yourself this question: ‘Do you believe you’ll be able to converse well with this person into your old age?’ Everything else in marriage is transitory” – Friedrich Nietzsche

This quote about marriage is seriously true. Can you imagine yourself with your partner in old age, still chatting, fondly bickering and laughing together? Because that’s what truly matters.

Nietzsche marriage quote

“By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher” – Socrates

Who knew ancient Greek philosophers had so much sass? We’re not sure if Socrates had a wife, but if he did he was throwing some serious shade at her with this quote about marriage.

Read more: 15 hilarious quotes for the stressed out bride

Socrates quote about marriage

“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person” – Mignon McLaughlin

From sassy Socrates to the meaningful words of Mignon McLaughlin. This is one of our all-time favourite marriage quotes, as it’s just so true.

Mignon McLaughlin marriage quote

“Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you said; after marriage, he’ll fall asleep before you finish saying it” – Helen Rowland

More material for the best man’s speech! You’re guaranteed to get a few laughs with this clever quote from Helen Rowland.

Marriage quote by Helen Rowland

“What counts in making a happy marriage is not so much how compatible you are but how you deal with incompatibility” – Leo Tolstoy

Words of wisdom from Tolstoy – it’s about how you deal with the things that make you different that really count, because the similarities are the easy bits.

Leo Tolstoy on marriage

“A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short” – Andre Maurois

This quote from Andre Maurois about marriage is so lovely – when you find the perfect person, you never run out of things to talk about, and there never seems to be enough time to spend together talking about those things.

Andre Maurois quote about marriage

“I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one’s wife happy. First, let her think she’s having her own way. And second, let her have it” – Lyndon B. Johnson

The former President of the United States, Lyndon B. Johnson, shared this funny quote about marriage that would be ideal for a best man’s speech.

Read more: 15 funny quotes that perfectly sum up your relationship

Marriage quote from Lyndon B Johnson

“My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my love to marry me” – Winston Churchill

From a president to a prime minister! Winston Churchill, possibly the most famous Prime Minister of all time, was married to his wife, Clementine, for nearly 60 years. He was Prime Minister of the UK twice, but considered marrying his true love to be his greatest achievement. Goals – and one of the loveliest marriage quotes.

Winston Churchill marriage quote

“The real act of marriage takes place in the heart, not in the ballroom or church or synagogue. It’s a choice you make – not just on your wedding day, but over and over again – and that choice is reflected in the way you treat your husband or wife” – Barbara De Angelis

Barbara De Angelis is an American relationship consultant, and this quote from her speaks volumes. It doesn’t matter where or how you marry, what matters is the choice you make and continue to make.

Wise marriage quote by expert

“Marriage is not about age; it’s about finding the right person” – Sophia Bush

Actress Sophia Bush has no time for ageist comments. When you know, you know.

Quote about marriage by Sophia Bush

Feeling inspired? Check out our favourite love quotes for even more ideas when it comes to personalising your vows or wedding speeches – or just to send in a nice text to your partner!

Zoe Burke
Written by

A total geek for all things wedding-related, Group Content Editor Zoe has worked in the industry ever since graduating university. You'll often find her located near the wedding cheese stands at the National Wedding Shows.

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