And do you solemnly swear to protect me from spiders as long as we both shall live |

9 Funny Quotes to Use in Your Wedding Vows or Wedding Speech

Inject a bit of humour into your vows or speech with a joke or jolt of fun. Here’s a compilation of 9 of our favourite funny quotes to use in your wedding vows or wedding speech.

Funny Quotes You Should Use in Your Wedding Vows or Wedding Speech |


Print a copy of these quotes off and mount them on a DIY cardboard or wooden sign for a quick and simple venue decoration, keepsake, or prop for during your wedding speech!

1)  Dear love of my life…

Dear love of my life I just want you to know how much I've enjoyed annoying you all this time and how excited I am to keep doing so in the future |

2)  You’re the weirdest person I know…

You're the weirdest person I know That's why we're perfect for each other |

3)  I vow to believe you…

I vow to believe you when you compliment me and I promise to only use sarcasm when necessary |

4)  I promise to love you…

I promise to love you respect you support you and above all else make sure I'm not just yelling at you because I'm hungry |

5)  Protect me…

And do you solemnly swear to protect me from spiders as long as we both shall live |

6)  The zombie apocalypse…

I promise to fight by your side in the zombie apocalypse and should you turn into one I promise to let you bite me so I can be one too |

7)  Watch it together…

I promise I'll hold off watching the next episode of whichever show we're into until we can watch it together |

8)  All the love and support…

I vow to give you all the love and support that I give my pets |

9)  My kind of weird…

You're my kind of weird |

Extra Touches

Plan your wedding speech or wedding vows in style with one of our collection of linen pocket journals. Coming in charcoal or ivory with golden embossed personalisation, they’re available as His or Her vow books and a wide selection of note books. Decorate your own book with a length of fabric, ribbon, or sparkling metallic gold twine and a pretty charm to make it even more special.

His and Hers Wedding Vow Books |

Featured above: “His Vows” Charcoal Linen Pocket Journal and “Her Vows” Ivory Linen Pocket Journal

If you’re looking for more ideas and inspiration for your wedding vows or wedding speech, check out our Wedding Vows or Wedding Speeches and Toasts  article sections.








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